Sitting Idle

I am sure many of us go through a phase in life when the only thing one has to do is sit idle. Looking from outside this seems like a very peaceful exercise, or shall I say a state longed by many and achieved by very few after years of hard work. In corporate slums, as the old warhorses say that this is the closest thing to utopia. One is paid to sit and not do anything; the only expectation is to make least noise while one is sleeping. Well for good or bad, deserving or not, I happen to be in this phase just after two year in these slums.

Whenever someone asks me what is it like? I say what was told to me, that this is the best thing that can happen to one. However deep with in I fear I am hiding this feeling of disappointment, quite like reaching atop of a steep hill after treacherous trek and finding that the view is as good as it was from the start of the track.

When I share this with myself the question that pops up in my head is “Could it be possible that all we are programmed to do is to look for reasons to be unsatisfied”. It is like a big strategy by some twisted mind to take the society forward at the cost on very individual it consists of.
One a personal scale if I dwell on it long enough I feel that this is the classic struggle between ambition and peace. On one hand, we are expected to aim for more and more, on the other it is about finding a place of yours in this complicated task of living a life. Both directions holds a strong argument, I believe the question that remains is “when”. Is it more like following a certain path (aiming for more) till a point‘t’ and then switching your regime to another.

So what define success or failure then, is it just choice or there is no true measure of this commodity. I tend to agree with the later argument, for one this holds true for almost everything in life and for other it gives me a way to escape from answering the former. This also gives one a freedom to look for reason to proclaim our self successful against what we are programmed to do. More than enough for me!!